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Michael Brown conspiracy

http://conservativetribune.com/possible-ferguson-witness-killed/

If it is true that people who witnessed the shooting were threatened, then that means that dozens, perhaps hundreds, of people knew DAMN WELL that Brown was guilty, that he brought the shooting on himself; and that they instead acted as if he were innocent.

This is disgusting.

People like this DeAndre Joshua are the hope of the black community.  It is an abundance of people willing to do the right thing, even though unpopular, which makes white America work.  If this is true, this kid showed both a lot of courage and a lot of integrity.

People like that are worth being proud of.  They do the black community proud.

And the people who shot him, if we are understanding this story correctly, are the BANE of black America.  They are the ones who drag it down, make it hellish, make it impossible to get ahead.  They should be fought at every corner, across every front, every hill and every valley until this useless rage is removed and replaced with common sense and common decency.

Don’t hold your breath though.

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Post unlikely to make it through the filter, somewhere on the internet. . .

Response to article by black man essentially saying that blacks are always (uniquely) being picked on, doubting that Brown was guilty, and we whites really just don’t understand black people, mostly because we are stupid and don’t listen. He starts and ends by calling all dissenters bigots.



It may come as a surprise to you, but when you reference
the word “bigot” in both the opening and closing paragraphs, assume your points
are made beyond any possibility of contention, and accuse anyone who disagrees
with you of being “self-righteous”, some people take offense at that.
Not everyone who disagrees with you is racist, and in
fact most whites I observe have reached a point where, after so many years of
the absolutely unanchored, unrestrained, reflexive use of that word to demonize
everyone and stifle rational discussion, that we consider it a species of
attempted bullying.
You are not right because you are black any more than I
am right (or wrong) because I am white. 
It is racist, in the genuine sense of the word, the real sense of the
word, to say otherwise, in my view.
Now, you are a psychologist.  As such, you have received scientific
training.  You KNOW that a few anecdotes
do not amount to a open and shut case. 
Let me offer some statistics: http://www.bjs.gov/content/pub/pdf/ard0309st.pdf
42% of arrest related deaths were among white people,
and 32% among blacks.  The total number
among all races was nearly 3,000 last year, making Michael Brown a drop in a
bucket.  If I extrapolate, that is some
1,260 white people.
One thing that irks me is this seeming black contention
that bad things ONLY happen to them.  Do
think all of these deaths among whites were justified?  Do you think the mothers and fathers of these
kids cried any less, felt less rage at the system?
And you avoid the question as far as single parenthood.  The simple reality is that poverty does not
create single parenthood.  There have
been strong families throughout human history living in much worse conditions
that the average ghetto or country farm. 
SINGLE PARENTHOOD CREATES POVERTY.
Black girls (and for that matter white girls) who
graduate high school and who marry and stay married to the father of their
first child rise out of poverty, even if that is where they started, very
quickly.  To stay poor, you need intergenerational
single mothers—preferably uneducated–and we both know—and I can demonstrate
demographically—that this is much more common in black homes.
And the children of two parent families avoid nearly all
the bad things associated with single parent homes.  They are less likely to be criminals, high
school dropouts, to get someone pregnant or get pregnant, and to do drugs or
abuse alcohol.  These things are well
documented.
And on that note, I would offer my own anecdote: a
friend I went to college with signed up with the LAPD and eventually worked
several years in the South Central Los Angeles. 
He said he saw the same stupid shit day after day after day after
day.  It never let up.  He eventually left because it was making him
cynical and racist.  He started detesting
himself.
But it is a matter of clear, empirical fact that blacks
commit nearly all crimes at rates 2-3 times that of white people (the
multiplier is even higher with Asians). 
For violent crimes it is as much as 10x higher: http://online.wsj.com/articles/jason-riley-the-other-ferguson-tragedy-1416961287  (Riley is black, by the way).
Are you going to seriously contend that cops be so
inhuman that they completely fail to learn from repeated experience?  Are you going to say that blacks bear NO
RESPONSIBLITY for the experience cops have that they are much more likely than
whites to commit virtually every crime that happens outside Wall Street?
Here is the thing: until the black family is
reconstituted, the pattern of failure we have seen over the past 50 years will
continue.  Poverty will continue, crime
will continue.  Whites will continue to
build themselves communities isolated in all but expressed verbal intent. Put
another way: they won’t admit what they are doing, but they will do it anyway.  Ferguson is black because the whites moved
out.  It’s illegal for Real Estate Agents
to mention race, but do you seriously think they need to? 
And you can’t blame them.  Who wants to live in a high crime
neighborhood?  I’ve done it.  I was scared every day I or my wife would be
attacked.  I heard a guy get shot.  Another kid got shot a block from my
apartment.  Another kid got shot outside
the movie theater.  I had to hide all
change and everything of value in my truck, and put a club on it, lest it get
stolen.   In that area, that year,
roughly 15 cars were stolen in roughly a 10×10 square block area a month.
No doubt your own work is useful, but can you seriously
claim that you can affect more than perhaps a few hundred lives in the next
five years?  The problem is nationwide,
and affects many millions.  By and large
the kids who are going to be trouble, are on that path by age 10 or so, in my
own estimation.

I readily grant the conditions of our ghettos are
appalling, as are the lives of many who live in them.  But this is not White America’s fault.  We have bent over backwards trying to help,
and many of us are suffering severe compassion fatigue.
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Race and injustice

One would think, reading accounts of “white privilege” that all you have to do to succeed in America is be white.  This ignores that most poor people in this country are white. It ignored the enormous amount of work and preparation it takes to succeed, work which is not done by the unsuccessful, in what I would hope is an obvious tautology.  Those who do not succeed did not do what it takes to succeed, however they define it.

One gets the impression that ONLY blacks have experiences with unfairness, with being judged prejudicially, with dealing with stupid, abusive people.  Only blacks have to deal with foreclosures and lost jobs, bad credit scores and banks that won’t lend to them.  Only blacks have bosses who demand too much of them, or won’t hire you because they don’t like you.  Only blacks deal with poverty.  Only blacks get arrested and put in jail.  Only blacks get shot unnecessarily by cops.

This is bullshit.  Life is hard for nearly everyone, and it is often unfair.  We do not make it more fair in general by redistributing rights from one group to another.  To quote William Boetker, you cannot raise anyone up by tearing someone else down.  What blacks need to do is copy white (and Asian, even more so) cultural models to succeed.

They are not doing this.  Why is anyone’s guess, but one thing is obvious is that a whole INDUSTRY–and by industry I mean a for-profit business enterprise–exists almost entirely to tell them that nothing is under their direct control, their personal decisions don’t matter, and that whatever they do and say, it is OK.

This is a form of abuse.  It is a form of cruelty.  As I have said often, it is the mother who coddles her 600 pound son who finds it just too hard to get out of bed and function.

The idea of people going hungry and homeless is repugnant to me, but it needs to stated and emphasized that the FIRST LINE of defense against poverty is a JOB, and TWO PARENTS.  It is not the government.

Democrats more or less literally toss little candy treats from their election parade floats and claim that thereby they “support” black people, and that opposing them is opposing black progress, justice, and the American Way.  These floats start at one black tie cocktail party, and end at another.  They might stop in high end ghettos and drop their g’s, and try to pretend to be “Barry on the Block”, but they don’t stay long.  No campaign donations there.

EVERYTHING they do makes jobs more scarce.  It makes them pay less, because in a down economy, there is downward pressure on wages, just as there is SUBSTANTIAL upward pressure in good times. [Minimum wages laws, obviously, when set above prevailing market wages, create downward pressure on employment outright.]

This would be true, of course, in conditions of fixed labor supply.  If you add 5 million people to the labor pool, it pushes yet farther out any possible improvement in at least low skilled jobs, and increases poverty.  It is no accident, or an unforeseeable outcome that black incomes have plunged under Obama.

It is significant and no accident that Democrat approval ratings have plunged among the working class, which is historically the people who voted Democrat, because they “looked out for the little guy”.  I heard my grandfather say this often.  It may have been true at one time–particularly when people like FDR looked out for the WHITE “little guy”, giving many contracts to unions who refused to hire blacks, but that has long ceased to be the case.  They merely appeal rhetorically to every constituency who might be counted on to vote for something free (to them, and apparently, since that is money that was diverted from alternative, structurally better uses.)

As one recent book title put it: Please stop helping us.

And I will add one more thing: no blacks alive today were victims of slavery.  No blacks endured/survived/transcended slavery.  By my reckoning we only have one large group that has, within living memory, endured slavery: the survivors of Nazi work camps.  We could add to that, I suppose, the many Vietnamese who survived Communist work camps.

The slavery meme is propaganda.  I had said that many people find in fear a grounding principle, but I could add to that many others find in rage and hate equally vivifying principles.

I see a MLK, Jr. movie is on the way, to reconnect people with struggles that were DONE almost entirely by 1970, some 44 years ago.  We just had “7 Years a Slave”, and Django, and who knows what else.

ALL of this detracts from a core reality: black people are capable of doing work THEY ARE NOT DOING.  I see no point in beating around the bush.  I see no reason to assume less of them, to consider them inferior, or to give than an on-going pass from adult responsibility simply because as a group they HISTORICALLY perhaps endured more than most whites (life on the frontier was no joke, though).

What they endure now, the conditions in their neighborhoods, are their own.  Most poor people in this country are white.  Nobody sheds any tears over them, nor should they.  They make decisions consistent with poverty, in some places, generation after generation. That is their prerogative.  

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Zombieland

I was watching Zombieland–doing my Movie Yoga, watching movies I would not normally watch, to see what comes out–and I just felt this terrible isolation and fear coming from the film.  The narrator of the film lost contact early on with his family.  He was alone before the zombies.

And I felt this isolation, this terror, this profound, unspeakable trepidation about the future of our very complex civilization, in the face of all the forces tearing us apart; I felt this is not just my particular malady.

Have we entered the realm of family as voluntary association?  In some respects this is an evolution of the concept of individualism, but it is also a reflection of the determined assaults by cultural nihilists upon all the non-coercive, non-violent, voluntary forces which bring us together, which keep us together.  Values like honor and loyalty and impartial kindness, and REASON.

Do sanity and connection not feel for many of us like increasingly endangered islands?  In that movie, they found a family of sorts, comradery, love.  But were they not unanchored, in constant danger and motion?

We feel zombies among us.  I see zombie parades all over the country.  Why do people want to be zombies?  What is the attraction?  Does it not allow them to greet and identify and engage with something in their lives that makes them feel unimportant, disengaged, separated?

Does it not allow them to contact forces of rage and violence which they cannot otherwise give voice to?  The need to “cry without weeping, talk without speaking, scream without raising your voice.”

Why not take “the poison, from the poisoned stream”?

I have, for many years.  It’s so easy.  It’s much easier than greeting head on horror, confusion, loneliness, doubt, and a sense of futility.

But I don’t quit.  For the duration of my life I will offer my soul, sacrifice my being, shake like a leaf, watch horror flow through me like a black river, and work for something better that I can communicate and teach.

There is no other game in town.  Failure greets all of us at some time, on some level, but sometimes the task is simply keeping the torch lit, and carrying it as long as you can.

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Fear

I was in a deep meditation yesterday, and realized that fear is a part of my identity.  I don’t know how to be my “self” in a condition of deep relaxation.  I must invent that self, never having been it.

And one can easily psychologize my posts from yesterday. Without saying ANYTHING about the truth value of what I posted, one can ask why I sought all that out. It was there two days ago, and a week ago and a year ago.

And the answer lies in this vacillation I am increasingly feeling between relaxed well being, and the fear that the other shoe is getting ready to drop.  Back and forth, back and forth.  One can start with fear and then justify it.  There are plenty of ways to do this, from global warming/ecological devastation, to preoccupation with an Islamic Nuke/EMP.  It’s all there for you to use, if you so choose.  All of them will allow you to direct your life along that path of that fear.  They can give meaning to you, if you choose to use it that way, but not deep meaning, as I would understand it.

What happens if you realize Global Warming is bullshit?  Or that Iran has no intention of sacrificing itself in its crusade for vengeance on the world?  What happens if sustained peace and prosperity break out?

On some level, to find peace one must accept death, daily death, a daily reckoning, a daily dance with life which you remember will never come again in exactly the same way, and accept. You accept the passing of what just was and will never be again. You accept in that act the value of the present moment.

Living well and dying well cannot be separated, in my view.  Mourning cannot be separated from joy, freedom from constraint.

I am not saying anything new, but I feel it perhaps more than I normally do.

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Boston Bombing

Well, now I’m getting used to the idea of “crisis actors”.  Why wouldn’t this be next?  I couldn’t stand it.

http://www.fromthetrenchesworldreport.com/are-you-just-a-believer-or-do-you-think/41807

It only takes one blatant, inexplicable fact to destroy an entire narrative.

Here’s another link: http://deepinsidetherabbithole.com/The_Boston_Bombing_Hoax.html

What is happening?  There seems to be a rot deep within this nation.  It is not in the ordinary people, who have in many respects been made mediocre by an inferior educational system, which teaches conformity and not critical thinking, and fails to impart basic facts about finances, economics, political theory, and history.  Those people by and large are decent, just dumb.

Where it lies is in the failure of our elites, our alleged best, our supposed best, those who are supposed to be smart, to be the experts, for everyone else.

These people have been failing for a very long time, and their failures have directly supported these increasingly brazen false flag operations.

Edit: 3 people supposedly died in the bombing: Krystle Campbell, Martin William Richard, and Lingzi Lu.  If it was a hoax, what happened to them?  Did they ever exist?

That will have to wait.  I am screwing my sleep time up completely.

Well, this person has this to say: http://nodisinfo.com/more-proof-of-the-richards-family-hoax/

Krystle Campbell: https://archive.org/details/KrystleCampbellALIVE

Lingzi Lu, nothing found yet, but if she was a “foreign student” she would have had family to claim her.

One last link: http://www.freedomslips.com/boston3.htm

Edit: I’m not going to say definitively that this bombing did not happen.  The photos seem to show staging going on, and otherwise inexplicable behavior, but there are two layers to this: 1) it didn’t happen; 2) it wasn’t done by who we were told did it.  I am not the only one who found it profoundly weird that Dzoker got a throat wound between being caught and the time he wound up in jail.  It seems obvious to me that AT A MINIMUM more people were involved than we have been told.  There are a number of things that just don’t add up.

And am I the only one who remembers that when this bombing–or whatever it was–happened North Korea was threatening us with nuclear war?

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Maybe there is a government conspiracy

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BplUD6kQYuU

This is a long speech by a former high level FBI officer (I assume his claim is true).  Here is his Wikipedia entry: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ted_Gunderson

He apparently was considered to head the FBI as a whole. This guy is not a kook.

1) The first World Trade Center bombing was the result of a bomb provided to an informant by the FBI, named Emad Salem.  The FBI had, or should have had, foreknowledge.

Link: https://archive.org/details/1993WorldTradeCenterAnFBISetup-TedGundersonAnthonyJHilder_0

2) The Oklahoma City bombing was also done by the government.  It used something called a barometric bomb.

Link: http://goldenageofgaia.com/2011/04/23/michael-riconisuto-on-the-barometric-bomb-that-brought-down-the-murrah-building/

Link: http://www.deseretnews.com/article/660197443/Nichols-says-bombing-was-FBI-op.html?pg=all

3) 9/11 of course was also an inside job.  I have posted extensively on this, and am evolving to the conclusion that our government–parts of it, not all of it, or even most of it–were involved.

4) There seem to be cults operating in the US.  This case is much more circumstantial, but not absent either.

http://educate-yourself.org/cn/ciadrugsabusemurder.shtml

Here is a video he mentions I have not yet watched: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sQHrbJPhus4

We need to remember that most people are good.  Most people object strongly to such evils.  We are not helpless, even if ALL this is true.

I feel I should add as well that it’s 3 in the morning, and I”ve been  at this 4 hours.  I am perhaps missing some obvious objection, but it seems to me, logically, that people who are nuts do not rise to be considered to head organizations like the FBI.  There has to be a history of competence, analytical intelligence, organization, drive, and integrity.

This is the first time I’ve seen this allegation with regard to the first WTC bombing, but as I noted some months ago, the case is clear that Oklahoma City cannot be explained as ANFO bomb.

Here is a copy of a letter written by an Air Force Brigadier General with (according to him) considerable experience in bomb damage assessment saying it could not have been the result solely of the alleged sole source: http://okcbombingtruth.com/docs/PartinReport.pdf

That’s enough for tonight.

Edit: I got a shitty night’s sleep, but am awake enough for now.   Gunderson says there are I think he said 60,000 human sacrifices a year in this country.  That sounds absurdly high.  If he said 100, I could see it.

I don’t know what to believe.  I go in and out of this conspiracy theory.  9/11 my mind is 100% rock solid on, and once you take that trip down the rabbit hole, a whole lot more comes to seen possible.  I’m going to leave this alone for a while, though.  I served my cause of summoning fear, and distracting me from inner work I would otherwise have been doing, but that’s not really a very good cause.

I will return, though.  I will return.

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Growth

The perfection of mourning is the perfection of wisdom.  I think I would summarize my philosophy of life thus, at the moment.

Everything we see is always simultaneously being born and dying.  There is nothing in this world you can hold on to, but love.  Love necessarily implies an ability to die, to be reborn in every moment.  It is simultaneously a great joy and a terrible curse.  Reconciling these two aspects of it is the essence of wisdom.  There is something beyond both: peace.

Everything you love will die.  You will die.  But you always have the present moment, and the closer you stay to it, the more life you will have before your dying and rebirth elsewhere.  These are of course core Buddhist teachings.  It is my belief that we need something beyond Buddhism, though.  Something new, something for our time, and our places.

[I’ve added things, so the flow is not great.  I’m OK with that.]

As I slowly open up–and I’ve been doing a lot of work recently I have not discussed here–I realize, I feel, how much I lost growing up, how much could have been there, how much should have been there, the happiness I could have felt, the relationship I could have had with parents and brother.

Thawing emotionally is like thawing physically: it hurts.  Unpleasantness opens up, which you had hidden in emotional numbness and more or less conscious forgetting.

To begin anew, you have to mourn what was–and what could have been, but was not.

The other day I posted on recently, where I felt bursts of happiness, and relief from the constant attacks I feel in my psyche every day, I also felt considerable irritability. I think sometimes growth is learning to pay with the worst, so you can get access to the best.  They must be mixed, because they HAVE been mixed: all possible joys have been pounded with deep sorrows, twisted and enmeshed, and then frozen.

They have their own energies, their own pathways, but everything that is in there has to come out and you have no choice, no way forward, but to take the good with the bad, and accept all of it without complaint or resistance.  You must have stamina, and patience, curiosity, and perhaps even a sense of humor.

And it occurs to me there are types of humor.  We might perhaps speak of the humor of acceptance, and the humor of rejection.  Robin Williams practiced the latter.

I’m sure I must have posted on this at some point, but I have this theory that most people exist consciously in perhaps 60-70 percent of their personalities, their experience, their psychologically important facts.  This is what they know.  This is what they think about and allow themselves to feel.  The remaining 30-40% is where Jungs Shadow lives.  I don’t think all of it is negative, but I think much of it is.

Comedians who practice the humor of rejection, who live their lives avoiding their sorrows and rages by making people laugh, percolate the tensions that create the absurdities that make us laugh from their unseen self, via a visible, and perhaps outwardly vibrantly happy and alive self.

I would contrast this with the ability to laugh at ourselves, with love, with affection.  I think I’ve spoken of this before, but one of my proudest moments with my oldest was when she came in to the living room laughing and crying.  She had hit her head on a closet door in the bathroom, bounced off reactively, and managed to hit her head on the OTHER door.  She found this stupidity and clumsiness hilarious.  I thought “I must have done something right.  This is a resilient kid.”  As indeed she is.

That’s enough for now.

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Rebellion, Middle Age

From roughly 21 until this year, I avoided psychotherapists.  I found them, to the extent they had an effect, harmful.  They seemed to facilitate whininess in me, and helped describe my problems well, without being able to solve them.

When I went to see one this year, she noted that it is very common for people to wait until their 40’s to begin processing deep emotional scars, because until then it is simply too much, your life is too chaotic.

We have this concept in our culture of a “mid life crisis”.  It tends to be viewed as a crisis of realizing one has been living inauthentically, and our culture is blamed.  I would submit that deep wounds often simply take half a lifetime to emerge fully enough to be dealt with.  Alternatively, we take half a lifetime to develop sufficient emotional strength to deal with such things, which causes the part of us which tries to protect us from overload to keep secrets.

I felt happy the other day, several times, inexplicably.  For people unfamiliar with long term depression, happiness is an odd emotion.  You look at it with skepticism, like a bird that has landed for a moment on your windowsill, but which obviously is on its way somewhere else.

And I felt happy in the middle of a demanding, frustrating twelve hour day, which was followed by another one.

And it occurred to me that feeling happiness when you are supposed to be angry, or sad, or whatever, is a sort of rebellion.  We tend to assume that rebelling must be an act of anger, of overthrow, of attack.

But is not happiness an attack on sorrow?  Is it not overthrowing what was in favor of what could be?

Thus I would meander.  Yes thus.

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Imprinting

For some reason this word came into my head.  I looked up animal imprinting, and this is the first thing that came up: http://www.sparknotes.com/biology/animalbehavior/learning/section3.rhtml

The gist is that certain things at very early ages can more or less get plugged into what we might term the “machine code” of our biological system, such that they are hard to undo (or impossible, if we accept the current state of knowledge as final.)

We are spiritual animals.  We are part machine, part pure freedom.  It seems to me our task, at this stage of our spiritual via biological evolution, is figuring out fully how the machine part of us works, so that we can CHOOSE to alter ourselves, or perhaps, allow energies we summon to guide us, and do the work necessary so we can follow more closely.