When you are in complete darkness, you cannot see it. But when you see a ray of light, everything else becomes dark by comparison.
And necessarily, those who live in the dark have to accustom themselves to the darkness. This is absolutely needed to avoid madness.
But emotional maladjustment, emotional pain: it becomes like a Stockholm Syndrome. It is easy to become attached to your symptoms and to your story. Your story is a ticket to self pity. It is a ticket to the pity of others.
Leaving this story behind, saying “I used to be this sort of person” is for many more scary than crossing the ocean of a life with a fractured self paradoxically intact.
You carry a broken plate and a shattered glass, not because you can eat or drink from them, but because you know them well. They are your companions in this strange, uncertain, and confusing world.