The sadomasochism of Christianity

I threw away both of my “Perfection through Death” flags today.  I needed them.  They were useful. But their usefulness is at an end.  I no longer need to confront the world, but to embrace it.

And sitting here, pondering, I feel I want to feel the world is a warm and comfortable place, one filled to be sure with many miseries, but one which, viewed properly, with wisdom, humility and acceptance, can be loved.

And then it hit me that the fundamental assumption of Christianity is that the world is a hostile place.  That is is dark and dangerous and animated by a vengeful God.  That temptation and sin–and following eternal damnation–are everywhere.  That fear of impiety, fear of imperfection, fear of error and sin, must attend every day of a person’s life.

We are told that God loved us so much that he gave us his only begotten son, as a human sacrifice, but what loving person first tells you he is going to torture you forever, then says, well, maybe if you do every last thing I tell you to perfectly, maybe I don’t have to?

No loving person says that.  When terror is present, all submissions cannot be viewed as  voluntary.  The love of God cannot be said to animate the person who fears God.  The two emotions are incompatible.  And what God could be said to be loving who created Hell?  Hell for people who refuse to accept 2,000 year old second hand accounts which were hand picked from a large abundance of alternative accounts, which were suppressed with violence by the religion of Love?

The situation is much more akin to someone who ties you to a wall, whips you mercilessly, then says that they will be kind, and if you only kiss their hand, they will let you go, and that you are supposed to feel grateful for this.

No, this whole thing is horrible.  Empirically I cannot side with the atheists, but psychologically I do.

I view the world as an interactive place, where the energy you put out is reflected in some way, as in a pond.  I believe that decent people go to varying grades of heaven, and that there are hells, but they do not last forever.  I believe we are eternal beings, and that I don’t have the faintest idea how to process that.

I am going to found my own Church soon.  I cannot say if it will succeed, but I can speak to the fact that I will make the effort. We can do so much better.