But what I am feeling right now is my essential inhumanity, my coldness, my distance.
These people marching in the streets–Antifa, BLM, et al–they are frightened. What they need in their hearts is for someone they TRUST to quiet them, and tell them its all going to be OK. You can calm down. The future is not going to hurt you. The world is not your enemy.
What they need is honest and heartfelt nurturing, of a sort I suspect most of them never got. Most of us, any more, in this mechanical and passively hostile world never get what we really need. Their parents were working. Their culture values them mainly for their capacity to contribute economically, and goodness is close to being equated with wealth. They were raised with computers with no souls. They were raised without profound and soul-level music and poetry. They were raised without communal dance and rejoicing.
We have no real festivals. We rarely or never meet Life together and with good cheer and optimism.
The image I get is villages where, when you cannot sleep, you get up and go to the center–which is not far away–and meet others and listen to stories you have heard many times, which quiet the soul, and eventually inspire refreshing sleep, and a spirit of openness to life in the morning when the Sun comes up again, as it always does.
It is of course a truism to say that most of us are separated from nature, but it is even more obvious we are living in manners which separate us from one another.
I for one am continually drawing lines. I can tell you why psychologically, and cannot yet tell you how to stop, but this important reality needs to be acknowledged. There are many like me.
This is a day, for me, for dreaming. I will not share all my dreams here yet, although the broad outlines should be clear enough. But I will say that I do feel a sense of destiny, that all my suffering has been for a purpose, that if God wills it, I may have a role to play in helping all of us out of our collective nightmares.