When people have difficult lives, and no spiritual tools to process them, then they get mean. Being mean makes you hurt less, at least consciously.
This is, I suppose, an old truth, but old truths need to be pulled off the shelves and dusted off from time to time.
To the extent I am right, I am presenting you with a mirror that is more honest than the one you use normally. We all put filters on our mirrors, don’t we?