Some of us refuse to listen. Let the rest of us listen more.
What I feel this morning is that with two narcissistic parents, logic alone dictates that I MUST have narcissistic tendencies myself. I was not taught nurturing and true kindness. And what I feel this morning is that the core FEELING at the center of a not-quite-malignant narcissism is the sense of no-self. I am not quite there. I do not quite have power over my actions. There is not a person quite there who would make any decision. I whip and beat myself, to survive, but it makes life unpleasant, and I would like life to be pleasant. True generosity flows from a feeling of abundance. It can come from no other place. God does not demand of us true self sacrifice, and most people who do sacrifice themselves, I think, do so out of habit, out of the feeling of shame that would overwhelm them if they did not. I think this is true of most soldiers, and no few wives of selfish men.
What I feel, now, is that this whole political conflict needs a new energy. We do need Trump going toe to toe with his countless critics, but for the rest of us internet warriors, and those among us who retain some ability to discuss politics around the dinner table, we need to adopt a spirit of non-violence. When they are violent, we need to be kind back. This is the only way. The actual physical violence has not broken out yet, but something needs to break the spell. Using the tactics and spirit of Martin Luther King, Jr., and Gandhi before him, seems to me at this moment the most likely candidate.
So if you are arguing with someone, feel the spirit of Gandhi infuse you. When you get angry, when they provoke you, respond always with kindness, and–and I’ve never said this before–an optimism that one day soon they will see the light. Present facts as possible. Present arguments as possible, knowing in advance they will twist them, ignore them, and respond mainly with lies they have been told somewhere.
It occurs to me that chronic anxiety and low grade anger are extremely fertile soil on which to plant any seed of Agitation, and those emotions are fed exceedingly well in our modern age. An addiction to your iPhone alone will ensure they are present.
There is no benefit to feeding this. Let us all try and remember who we are. We are not primitive beasts locked in a primal struggle. We are noble by birth, and should act the part. This does not mean surrender. It means, rather, continual effort, but patient effort, and effort founded on a confidence of eventual victory.
We may not win. I’m not one to speak empty optimism, But if we ARE to win, this is, I feel strongly, how it will happen.