I feel like I should comment that when I am feeling good, and not under intense stress from work, I laugh a lot, and really loud. More than once my kids told me they located me in some store because they could hear me laughing four aisles over somewhere.
You would likely never guess that from this blog. That’s not really a topic to discuss, but it is a reality. I have my issues, but I am not fundamentally unhappy most of the time, which might also sound surprising.
Emotionally, I would never describe myself as depressed. It is more like I stuck my finger in an electrical socket somehow, emotionally, and fried a lot of my wiring. What remains is good, but I’m having to rebuild a lot of it, which is a long term and painstaking process. I have gaps in my capacity I am working to remedy, and some circuits that cannot presently handle the loads they should be able to.