I was talking with a psychiatrist at the Hoffman Process, who referenced how “geniuses” access the world differently. I wouldn’t know about that, but I did comment that in my view emotional factors are hugely important. If you find something which is unimagined in your field, and then rejected, soundly, by the powers that be, do you persist? Who would Freud have been if he had stuck to his guns with his trauma theory? We can’t know. He didn’t, and this has hurt a lot of people.
As for myself, I am an UeberPisces. I go all in, knowing I will be destroyed. We are enthusiasts. We can’t help it. I am a moth driven to a flame which transforms me.
Death is a certainty, and should be welcomed. Whoever you were, you cannot forever be. Whatever you did, is undone. So why not jump in with both feet, and say Fuck It?