Social media means that we see–or think we see–what everyone else is up to. We see what they show us. And much of it–according to the people who created it, who run it, and who have become immensely wealthy through it–runs on the fear of missing out.
And much so called conspicuous consumption–say, photos of your skiing vacation in some expensive resort, with top quality skis and clothing and meals–consists mainly in the experience of the jealousy of others, and how much they admire you. You may have had a shitty time and spent money you didn’t have on things you didn’t enjoy, while spending time with friends and family who annoy you as often as gratify you, but you can get the REAL experience of a certain quality of attention from others. That is not made up. That is authentic.
And since he is kind of a cultural touchstone, even if most people don’t know or remember it, Jack Kerouac (and Neal Cassady) more or less evoked FOMO for everyone stuck in a stable situation. Life, we were told, is OUT THERE. If you are a square, you are MISSING OUT.
But they both died young and stupidly. Whatever life they were looking for, they never actually found it.
Here is what I will suggest: all of us should more properly be concerned with missing out on INTERNAL STATES SUBJECT TO CONSCIOUS CULTIVATION. I can’t say if you do yoga every day that something magical will happen, but I can just about guarantee you will be more patient, and over time more relaxed and cheerful. That is something you can’t buy.
Sitting still and doing nothing is moving around and doing a great deal, sometimes. If you just watch the whirl in your head, it can be more entertaining and certainly more useful than an equivalent time spent watching people playing make believe on a box that would stop working the moment you unplugged it.
What you are missing out on, the most important part, is not out there at all.
And imagine you achieve whatever your dream is. Let’s say you want to star in a Hollywood movie, or win the lottery and go on a trip around the world. Those feelings are ALREADY accessible to you. I honestly think that a sufficiently trained spirit, with enough focus and imagination, can conjure ANYTHING from nothing. I really think this is possible. Why not? All the neurological and energetic states that are possible for you should be possible at all times, right? If the buttons and switches are there now, why couldn’t you push them now?
I don’t know who is trying to rule the world, if there are competing groups and individuals, and multiple agendas, or how any of that works. But that they want FEELINGS is obvious.
Maybe they want the feeling of power. In my view the feeling of power is the feeling of a cessation of fear, for a moment. Nobody can hurt you, since you are in charge. Not infrequently it is combined with cruelty, which is delight in shaming others and inflicting fear on them. Those habits and proclivities in turn come from having had shame and fear inflicted on YOU. And that shame and fear is not exorcised by cruelty; it is merely abated for a time, which creates a temporary feeling of pleasure. But your inner knowing knows that it will return. It always returns, and will do so until healed.
Or maybe people THINK they want to help people. In that case, they want the sense of self satisfaction in knowing, or thinking, that they have helped people. That is still a feeling.
All of life is state management. All of life is understanding and working with the colors of emotions, of knowing them intimately and channeling and using them with skill and grace.
In important respects, evil is nothing other than deep emotional stupidity. It is running away from your hearts desire in the name of your hearts desire. It is self defeating. I don’t doubt it has its moments. I don’t think any of us are innocent of occasionally rejoicing in the failure of our enemies. But that is nothing to base a life on.