If you have no cave to retreat to when you are hurt, you learn to carry the cave with you.
I am realizing more and more that the process of emotional rehabilitation and growth is mainly doing less, not more. You do not overcome fear. You simply let it go away. You do not overcome anger, or indolence. You simply stop being angry, and start allowing your life energy to be productive and useful.
The act of relaxation is being alert and aware, but without any added complicating emotions. It is being present. That is what I am working on.