It is gradually occurring to me both that there is nothing to hold on to, and that this is OK. Life is an enormous ocean, with waves and tides, angry moods and pacific moods.
It is both true that there is no one and no thing to which I can cling, and that I am connected to everyone and everything, just not in a fixed way.
The tide comes and the tide goes, and people will invest entire lifetimes trying to prevent one inch of sway, holding, straining with all their might, when all they needed to do was accept and wait. It will come back, in some form, but you will fail to see it if you first blind yourself.