I saw my kids today, and it occurred to me that as they grow, it is necessary to regularly renegotiate your relationship with them. I want to think of them as they were then, but that is not how they are now. Their job is to individuate and grow off in their own direction. My job is to recognize and support this, to remain in emotional touch, but nothing close to emotional control, or even a strong desire to influence, if they are not asking my advice.
Life is a dance, and you can’t dance if you never move your feet, or pay attention to the people you are dancing with. It’s beautiful and sad, and although there is much wisdom most of us will never see, there is, if we wait and look and hope and prepare, much wisdom we WILL see. This is the seasoning of aging, of separating, and of renewing.