Month: November 2021

I had this vision this morning of the universe as a book where each page contained a different reality.  All the realities were stacked on each other, right next to each other, much like radio frequencies are stacked on top of each other too.

And someone developed a camera by means of which to look into other realities, and the ability to watch it, like TV.

And the size of the book: well, if that is all there is, is there a difference between it being a nanometer and a 100 million miles across?  Measurement is only possible with perspective.

Maybe all the light in all the parts of the sky we can see, and that we can’t see, are a dot in the midst of something else.

I don’t spend too much time in things like this, but I spend some.

I think the adoption of shame, unconsciously or semi-consciously, acts to alleviate symptoms of anxiety.  I made this rough argument recently, although I don’t recall the exact words I used.

This would make masochism a palliative for fear, as I also argued.

The flip side of this is that moving from shame to self acceptance will necessarily trigger anxiety.  And I would argue this anxiety continues to some extent indefinitely.  Those of us who have been cut in our souls want to be “normal”, which is to say free from these emotions we don’t choose and which never go away.  But there is a path beyond that, too, isn’t there?  Up the hill and off into the distance?  Why stop with normal?  Why not superior, in the ways that matter, which might well include a vast sense of humility and acceptance?

I have been working hard recently, and it hit me that a key element of stamina is simply accepting that the physical pain in your arms or legs or back, or all three, will not stop.  You can’t avoid it, and you can’t get the job done while trying to avoid it.  You simply have to get used to a continual dull ache.  You have to forget about it, and focus on the task at hand.

Emotions are no different, I don’t think.  I think all of us, to grow, need to learn to deal with anxiety. And ironically enough, I think the process of learning to deal with and accept anxiety probably makes it disappear, or greatly diminish.

I’m always working on slightly better ways to say things.  As a youth I would often write down quotes I liked.  One was Thoreau’s “it need not be long, but it can take very long to make it short.”  That’s close if not exact.

HCQ and Ivermectin are FDA approved drugs.  Does this not make them at least equal to the spike protein injections?

As I understand it the FDA does not approve each use of each drug.  No separate process happened to allow doctors to prescribe HCQ for Lupus and Rheumatoid Arthritis, or Ivermectin for scabies.  The FDA approves a drug once for a given use, then after that it is up to the discretion of individual medical professionals.  This makes the system more flexible, more resilient, and more effective on balance.  Their main concern is safety.  Having established that, the rest is out of their hands, by law and by long established practice.

And obviously once “out in the wild” each drug can be tested for various uses.  There is nothing preventing labs of all sorts from seeing what other value uses exist for any given treatment.  But as I understand it, that is not within the FDA’s bailiwick.

Nor is it within that of the NIH or CDC.  They have the power to issue recommendations only, not force compliance.  It was only with the voluntary (and might I say cravenly complicit) backing of the AMA that they were able to push their anti-scientific agenda on the United States, at least as I understand it.

In principle these spike protein injections could now be used for other purposes than COVID, although it is unlikely there ARE any other uses for them.

We have endured 20 months of lunacy and tyranny precisely because the system was broken from on high and ON PURPOSE.  I see no other honest way to look at it.

I ask myself why that specific argument never occurred to me. (Maybe it did, and I’ve forgotten, but I don’t remember typing it much).  I think the answer is that it is really hard to think clearly when you are being abused as violently as possible, in words alone, and being called every name under the sun.

They are FDA approved.  Approved as safe.  This is the same argument the spike protein people are using to defend Pfizer.  If it is a sound argument, then the argument for HCQ and Ivermectin is AT LEAST as good, and obviously in the sane, non-clown world, vastly, vastly better.

And I think the best way to describe what these jabs do is teach the body to attack itself.  This is not an exaggeration, even though the claim made is that the attack is short lived, not injurious, and provides a salutary benefit.

I don’t think this claim is valid.  As I understand it the lipid nanoparticles in these shots act as a delivery mechanism to nearly all the organs in the body.  This fact ALONE differentiates these shots from ALL traditional true vaccines, which remain in the shoulder.  In traditional vaccination, your immune cells happen on this foreign thing, decide hey this is bad, and replicate defenses to it that DO travel everywhere in the body.  But it stays in the shoulder.

So, again, the fact of full body exposure is already a broken link with the history of vaccinations.  And with respect to all true vaccines I know of, with the exception of the flu vaccine, these things do not confer immunity.  So anyone lumping these things in with smallpox and the measles is being dishonest.  Apples and spiders.

Fear makes everyone stupid, and we have been living in fear for some 20 months.  Throughout all this I have worked hard not to lose my mind, and I think when we have a better idea what these shots do–and I do think a lot of it will be bad–I think my record will be pretty good in how I called all this stuff.  I don’t think anyone listens to me, but this writing is a good outlet for a particular type of anxious energy I continue to wrestle with.

The revenge of the mediocre.  This would apply to Nazism, too, but we are not facing Nazis anywhere as far as I can tell (although I continue to believe Klaus Schwab may well have Nazi sympathies).

Here is how I would put it: life is a process of flowing, moving, evolving, changing, growing and eventually flowing into a completely different form by “dying”.  The opposite of life is stasis.  It is paralysis.  It is dying to the day, rejecting the day emotionally, the same way every day, or as close to the same way as possible.

It may sound difficult to die to each day, but all you need are fixed ideas, which are best containered [sic] within an ideology.

Totalitarianism fits the mediocre with a new face, a new purpose, a life that is not a life.  It is an emotional suicide that people choose in lieu of actual suicide.

And all of this is very old.  Joan Grant spoke of a cult of Set in ancient Egypt.  That is all Communism or Nazism really is.  It is a cult dedicated to death and the denial of life, which is to say change.

And if Truth is the animating principle for the living, then lying must necessarily be that of the dead.  Killing people to help them is a good example.  Committing atrocities in the name of justice is another.

And it’s interesting to read the principles of the Satanic Temple, which some Army officer reportedly got in trouble for sharing.  There is nothing to object to, is there?  It’s all reasonable.

And yet they cling to this imagery, and this myth (understood as a deep emotional symbol) of Satan.

So it seems obvious to me that the first principle they would teach at the first initiation is to invert all of them.  The true first principle is to lie as often as possible, about everything.

As I say, all of this is very old.  These are recurrent possibilities in human experience, so they are recurring realities.  The urge to remain still is both primitive and powerful.

I was thinking about it this morning, and snakes are not really that clever, from what I can tell.  They are not cunning.  They are SNEAKY.  They are really, really good at going unnoticed until they strike.

And this is how snakey people are.  They don’t have to be that bright.  They just have to be really good at seeming to be something they are not.

The Nazis were not really exceptional as human beings.  Hitler was good at reading people, at knowing how to rile them up, but he was not that smart otherwise.  Goebbels was talented at deception, but was otherwise nothing special.

And the same can be said of all the Communists.  As many, many people have remarked, what is remarkable about the people who committed all these crimes is their mediocrity, their lack of wit and wisdom, their lack of talents and creativity.  They are just dull, dull people, and they surround themselves with dull, gray people.

And I am very sure the same can be said of the people mostly running the world now, and who are now seeking complete and more or less open control.  Can you imagine having a beer with Bill Gates?  Or Anthony Fauci?  I’ve met a ton of guys like Fauci in bars.  I pick up on their BS immediately.  He is a cocky asshole, who says whatever suits him at the moment.

Life is full of what look like tragedies from this level, and one of them is how often the rancid rise to the top.  All it takes is a plan, consistency, and a willingness to use any means necessary.  And I think for many of these people, the means ARE the ends: crapping on people is the goal, and the main focus is just on increasing the range of their shit.

I have not studied Buddhist theory in many years, not since a class at Cal with Frits Staal, but one relatively clear recollection is that it is in some respects atomistic, in that time, space, and self are seen as discontinuous.  They are so many beads, called dharmas (dharma has a lot of meanings).

It just struck me that what most likely is “extinguished” in Nirvana (which means to extinguish or snuff out, like a candle) is the habit of continually renewing the same perceptual structures.  That structure builder, which we might usefully call the ego, simply lets things be.

What caused me to think this was a neurofeedback session I just did, in which I noticed the quality of my tinnitus altered slightly.  It has never done that, to my recollection.  And it hit me that some part of my neurological and perceptual apparatus would want to immediately return it to the status quo ante, even though it is mildly unpleasant.

Why would some unconscious part of me do that?  Because building castles in the air is what it does.

I think this is a beginning of a good approximation.

There are really only two arguments for vaccines in general: 1) that they reduce or ideally eliminate the risk of disease, injury and death; and 2) that they reduce the risk of transmission.

As concerns the dominant variant right now, Delta–and most likely any future variants–the data seems to indicate that they don’t really affect the likelihood of transmission much.

And for kids under 25 or so, which is to say pre-K through graduate students, the risk is statistically zero for those who are healthy.  It is not true that no one in that demographic died of COVID, but that nearly everyone who died was already seriously ill with something else, at a minimum obesity and related dysfunctions.

And after 20 months or so, we can quantify this risk reasonably well.  In that demographic, there is no reason to think anyone contracting COVID will suffer any long term effects.  My youngest had it at least once, and we both think twice, with the first, much more severe case happening in November of 2019.   But all systems are fine, and think this is the case generally.  She knows a dozen or more people who had it, and in some cases it was pretty awful, but no different from a bad flu, which remains more dangerous, statistically, than COVID, both in that specific demographic, and all the way up to age 70 or so, as I understand it.

But the risk of injecting biological material into people which has the effect of teaching the body to develop its own disease–in effect to learn to fight against itself–cannot be quantified.

Based on early results, it seems the IMMEDIATE result in many cases is blood clotting leading to all manner of ill effects.

But I think the more informed people are most concerned about the long term effects.  We do have some safety data on the six months or so effects, so saying they are safe is not completely misguided on the part of doctors, even though reasonable questions can be asked about the honesty and openness of the data.  Many of us think the CDC is cooking the books, and engaging in the health equivalent of financial fraud.

Come to think of it, they may literally be keeping two sets of books.  That is well within the realm of the possible.  I would even say it is likely, because even if they are lying, and know that they are lying, they will still want to know what the actual truth is, to the extent actually honest science can ascertain it.  Even honest science has doubts and questions.  In fact, the LACK of open doubt and questions is one of the best arguments against the sincerity of this whole edifice.

But what effect does the introduction of clotting factors, and genetic instructions to create damaging spike proteins have particularly on growing bodies?

Why should we NOT wonder  if they will lead to increases, particularly, in Autoimmune disorders, which are on the rise anyway, for reasons which are not completely clear?

I think both giving and advocating for giving these vaccines to kids is criminally reckless.

And I will wonder for the first time if perhaps Walensky belongs in jail also.  Keeping double sets of records would certainly justify it.  That is fraud.

And lying about safety is complicity in murder.

David Icke, who is really the extreme fringe of somewhat plausible conspiracy historians, has been making more and more sense to me lately.

Even this whole Reptilian thing: if you think of them as demons who exist mainly in another dimension, it makes a bit of sense.  Now, I have no idea how he comes by many of his ideas, and he quite often doesn’t say (I don’t think: I have not read any of his books).

As I have said before, most cities have at least three buildings in every 10 square blocks or so dedicated to the idea that God controls the world, that angels and demons exist, and that other dimensions exist where we go when we die.  Those basic ideas, as general ideas, are quite common.  Icke’s main contribution is deploying them in a new, non-traditional form.

But why assume our main narratives anywhere are “basically” right?  What if all the religions have some big things wrong, and science has nearly everything outside the material (apparently material, since “matter” does not seem to exist in a common sense way) even more wrong?  What if Sikhism and Sufism are closer to the important truths than anyone at MIT, but that they have misunderstood important things?

Science is skepticism.  This means science itself, as a method, should be viewed skeptically, which in my personal view means philosophy is ALWAYS prior to empiricism in any form.

Well, all that just came out.  What I logged on to say is that Icke has this notion of the Hassle Free Zone.  If you go along to get along, nobody bothers you.  If you start asking inconvenient questions, thinking for yourself, behaving in different ways, you get hassled.

This whole spike protein injection, functionally, is a massive contraction of the Hassle Free Zone.  Nothing like this has ever happened before.  A lot of Americans took the Swine Flu injection in 1976, but that was because they WANTED to.  Nobody compelled them to.  Back then, that would not have been tolerated by ANYONE, left or right.   And after a fraction of the issues we have already seen from these jabs, the “vaccine” was pulled off the market.

I knew a guy some years ago who loved to hire hookers and play a game where he would have them sit on one side of the bed, then the other, then a chair, then sit on the floor, or stand by the window.  It gave him a feeling of power, which presumably came with a sexual charge.

It seems to me the governments of the world are doing something not entirely different from that.  They want us to do one irrational thing one day, like wear cloth masks, then something else the next, like stay home, then something else, like take a jab which doesn’t have a fraction of the research needed to honestly declare it safe from a position of evidence.

It’s game, which has the intent of habituating us to reflexive compliance.  The Hassle Free Zone becomes smaller, and it MOVES.  What was good enough one day won’t be the next.

If we don’t start saying in larger groups FUCK ALL OF YOU, then there is no reason it will not continue and get worse.

If you have never met a psychopath, you don’t really understand how cold and inhuman they are.  Your life, your well being, your FEELINGS, not only don’t matter to them, they think it is FUNNY when you are in pain.

They are all on a path to death, and they love the company.  That is all I will say today.

If Donald Trump’s social media platform is even remotely as good as Facebook, they are going to lose at least a third of their users, quite possibly world wide.

This may be part of what motivated Zuckerberg to in effect diversify.  I know that VR has been on his radar since he read Ready Player One–or at least that is what someone who seemed to know what he was talking about told me in a bar a couple years ago–but they seem to be broadening their core business focus.

I will say again that I think a key feature, for me personally, would be real names.  All of us, in migrating, face the non-trivial task of finding the same friends.  I don’t want to be looking for names like FunnyGal427, friending them, then finding out it was FunnyGal428.

As long as I can protect who sees my posts, within reasonable limits, anonymity is not important.

It occurred to me that masochism is really an externalization of shame.

I really think there is a lot of value in adding shame to fight and flight.  I got that idea from Sebern Fisher.  If you think of two dogs, they can fight, they can run, one from the other, or one can SUBMIT to the other.  You’ve seen dogs who have been kicked too much (Springsteen lyric): they cower.  Their heads go down.  They are saying “I am not a threat”.

So there are really three ways of dealing with the threat of violence, but all come from approximately the same place in the limbic system, although now that I think about it, there is no neurological reason to think one or the other might not tend to predominate for various reasons.

When the klaxon is going off all the time, the world itself becomes the enemy, the threat.  Masochism then becomes a way of quieting that alarm by showing you present no threat.  You are nothing.  Nothing to worry about.  It’s instinctive, like cringing when something gets thrown at you unexpectedly.

Sadism, then, would be a counterreaction to masochism, which is to say expressed shame.  But masochism is logically first.  It comes from the frightened child, hiding in a corner, or in my case the attic and closets, trying desperately to avoid death and injury by signaling a lack of threat.

And even though, of course, the threat of death and injury passes–even if it is endured daily for many years–it is almost more real than real threats.  Real threats come to seem a relief in contrast.  This is another motivation for otherwise apparently irrational violence.

But masochism is showing obeisance to the universe, first, and not infrequently to other human beings.

I have told, I think, the story of the stripper who told me how she liked to be tied up and suspended, naked.  She was an “exhibit” at some emo music event at least once.  She said it relaxed her and made her feel free.

This hypothesis would explain that.  Her shame, ironically enough, disappeared when she was fully controlled.

I think this makes sense.