Month: September 2015

First off, according to Islamic law, the religion–and the duty to uphold the religion–passes from father to son.  Obama was BORN a Muslim, by Islamic law (assuming his father actually was Barack Obama, Sr., which I very much doubt; I believe, as I have said, that the bulk of evidence points both to Frank Marshall Davis being the real father, and his name on the birth certificate being the real reason they won’t release it), so he is EITHER an apostate or a Muslim, from the perspective of Islamic law.

This is FACT.  It is not disputed or disputable.

We further know that his religion was listed as Islam on his school records in Indonesia.  This is not disputed or disputable.

We live in this Bizarro-World universe where up is down and even allegedly conservative news networks (hint: we have none on TV) carry water for the most ludicrous, extravagant claims.

Obama’s birth certificate consisted in 4-5 PDF layers which were CLEARLY, unambiguously, if-this-was-a conservative-it-would-have-been-damning, faked.  Signatures were faked.  Names were faked.

And to commit an act of treason to the notion that we must be compliant, stupid, see nothing/know nothing future drones and apparatchniks, let me point out that the original copy was never made available to anyone.

I reiterate: Obama could not have gotten a drivers license with that certificate or proved citizenship, or joined the military.

If fails the most BASIC tests, and yet somehow these deluded or complicit lunatics in the media want to continue to portray those who question it as unhinged somehow.

I get that Trump wants to protect his lead, but I would still like to see him trot out a series of digital document experts and go through in some detail WHY this document is faked and why America should be angry both at Obama and those around him, but especially the sycophantic, dick sucking, ass licking media.

It might help to get some judges, and former bureaucrats to go on record saying that document would be unacceptable anywhere.  This lie does not become less important because it is the President telling it, it becomes MORE.  How is this lunacy possible?

It truly is disgusting.  Almost nobody has the balls to do their job.

Edit: I would add: Mr. Trump, this is the Meat Grinder.  Any front-runner for the Republicans, particularly, can expect relentless traps, relentless attacks, and the creation of scandal where none exists.

These people are ghouls whose humanity has been trained out of them, who attack because they have been taught to hate, who lie because they have been taught it is the best method for “progress”, and who feel neither remorse nor pity.  They are cruel savages, who will laugh at your downfall if they can engineer it, and celebrate the success of Hillary or Biden, knowing full well that there is no reason to expect any actual amelioration of the miseries of poverty, true racism, injustice, and pain of all sorts.  They will if anything increase them, because the little people will always be the little people to them.  Useful idiots, nothing more.

How many American kids do you think grow up with piggy banks?

Ponder for a moment what they actually symbolized when they were common.

I don’t watch the debates.  Why?  My opinion has no effect on who eventually gets inflicted on me as a choice.

I do keep hearing Donald Trump “isn’t Presidential”.  What the fuck can this even mean when we elected Barack Hussein Obama, a nothing from nowhere about whom we STILL know nothing, twice?

Obama’s ACTS Presidential.  That is the word, ACT.  It has been credible alleged that his entire persona is a creation based upon a friend of his from Chicago: http://www.examiner.com/article/actor-harry-lennix-says-he-trained-obama-to-act-presidential

We have to come to grips with the fact that our political process has become theater, where the tide appears to go one way, then the other, but in reality it is going out, and all of us will be swept away with it, absent some sort of pattern interrupt.

The pundits have been preaching and talking now since at least the 1950’s about Communist propaganda, declining moral values, and the importance of limited government.  But no matter who has occupied the White House–other than a brief hiatus under Clinton with a Republican Congress–government has done nothing but expand since the New Deal.  Barry Goldwater was talking about Republican sell-outs in 1960.

We can assume that if the Establishment is fine with a candidate, if there is no hooting and howling, if they are talking about what a “fine conservative” they are, how they are “electable”, “Presidential”, then that means they will simply continue the decline of America.  They may slow it, but they will not alter the end destination.

Trump’s ENTIRE appeal is that he is a loose cannon, or at least appears to be.  He has a huge ego, but that makes it harder to keep him in line.  What if he DOES just go ape-shit and start cutting expenses and programs?  What if he does raise taxes at the same time, and achieve a balanced budget?  Fiscal sanity was at one time unobjectionable on both sides of the aisle.  Even Democrats at one time thought a balanced budget was a good thing.  They just wanted more spending and more taxes.

We live in a strange world, so much of it abstract.  We are forced, by the nature of our system, to take an interest in, and try to form opinions about, people we will never meet, and likely never even see in person.  We forced to try and decipher how honest they are, what they might actually do, and to do so through a prism of repeated disappointment and failure.

And as I am realizing, it is important for mental health not to obsess too much about things far away and beyond any hope of control or management.  I think I personally look out when I don’t want to look in.  I also think that conflict makes me feel at home.  I have been in some form of war, I think, since the moment I first looked into my mothers eyes and she realized I was not the girl she assumed I must be.

The thing about the traumatized, I think, is that you seek out pain and conflict and danger, because otherwise you spend all your time anticipating it.  Once its there, you no longer need fear its emergence.  It is the pregnant silences which are perhaps most terrifying.

I am feeling less and less inclined to post here.  It seems I should spend more time with the fall leaves, and economically productive work.

I used to consume a lot of self help books back in the day, particularly when I started in Sales. Tony Robbins, and Zig Ziglar are the two I remember.  I particularly liked Zig Ziglar.

Just today I was looking at a list of goals I made 15 years ago about all the stuff I wanted, and all the experiences I wanted to have.  Many more came true than I would have guessed then, but many did not.

And I got to thinking about it: there isn’t a thing on there about work.  About a job.  To be sure, I had goals, but my mental focus was not there.  The process and the outcome were not emotionally connected.

They tell you do dream big, but here is the core truth, as I now realize: the way you get all the stuff, and all the experiences, is that you figure out how to LOVE the most basic tasks of your chosen field, and learn to love the process of learning to do them even better.  You have to fall in love with your craft.  And if you do that, then success is inevitable over some time horizon.

You have to start with the beginning, in the present moment, and the next task.  And they have to matter to you, and bring you some comfort and satisfaction when done well and consistently.  Everything else will take care of itself.

I feel stupid for not seeing this before.  To be sure, what I do for a living aligns well with my talents only to the extent that I have lots of free time to do the things I am good at, but if you are going to do a thing, why not extend the hand of friendship and affection to it, and bring it into your confidence and family?

Every excellence is a reward.  Mark that a bon mot.

Edit: the logical corollary to this is that the visualization that matters is visualizing work well done, and with pleasure.  Do this, and everything else happens, provided a very simple plan.

I woke up this morning thinking that if success is “progressively inventing new and better errors”–as I defined it somewhere–then repeated mistakes represent not failures of understanding, but prima facie evidence of compulsion.  They are psychological, not cognitive, or intuitive.

Our errors define us, do they not, in the same way our way of moving in the world does?

The point of forgiveness is to build resilient personal and social systems which are capable of learning and adapting in positive and beneficial ways.  If you only get to make one mistake, then you do your best to make NO mistakes, which makes learning impossible.  You have to make mistakes.  You have to be able to make mistakes.

My “Moral Code” revolves essentially around the development of emotional skill and self knowledge.  If someone were to plug some sort of brain controller in to you, and force you to do “the right thing” all day long, would that make you a better person?  Is being forced by social coercion and the threat of ostracism really that different?

I don’t even think one needs to posit that humans are “innately” good.  What I would posit is that a free individual or social system in motion will find their points of equilibrium and balance in ways of being which are  “good” as I define them.  Chaos rarely is.  Orders are simply hidden, and they are particularly hidden when free motion is encumbered or even prevented.

And the converse applies: confinement and restriction breed meanness and feed what is always potentially bad in human behavior.

Whatever the message Jesus taught, I think it was perverted by the emerging Church to help ensure the financial and political power of the elites.

What makes sense to me is that he taught that God is not a fucking imbecile, and of course you get multiple second chances.  And I think notions of eternal Hell were entirely absent, even if relative hells were present.  In point of fact, I believe those exist.

But think this through.  Animal sacrifices were commanded by the Torah, and were to be done at the Temple of Jerusalem.  That Temple was destroyed.  This would have represented an existential thread to Judaism outright.

Christianity found almost all its early adherents in Jews, and they seem by and large to have preserved at least for a 100 years or so many Jewish practices.

Animal sacrifice is for the expiation of sin.  Sins, after the destruction of the Temple, could not be atoned.  So why not, one can see someone reasoning, make of Jesus the FINAL sacrifice?

But if there is only one sacrifice, there can only be one expiation, and that logically implies that a choice has to be made with permanent consequences, which in turn implies that you go one way or the other, your sins are expiated or they are not.  If not, you don’t get another chance, which means that if you don’t go to Heaven, then you go to Hell, and if you go to Hell, and you don’t get another chance, then that sentence is eternal.

This is logical, even if wrong and even stupid to the point of being abusive.  Certainly it could not have been better calculated to allow the inculcation of fear which could be harnessed to the cultivation of quite worldly ambitions.

I was dreaming last night that I was a member of a Boy Scout troop, or church, or some social group of some kind, and we were going to enact a battle for “fun”, but that we were going to use real weapons and real ammunition.  We were going to storm a church or theater or something like that, which was defended as a sort of fortress by the other side.

I initially demurred, and found myself near the back of the pack rushing the fences.  I couldn’t help but thinking “you are joking, right?” (as a side note, I normally know when I am in a dream, and have a fair amount of control–I choose where to go, and what to do, and can usually levitate, use psychokinesis, and sometimes even walk through walls–but have learned it seems to be best if I just watch things go and try and learn whatever lesson it is trying to teach me.)

But they weren’t.  In this “game” people on both sides were killed.  I participated on “my side”, those charging the defenses, but decided after a time to “recycle” the game, and it started again.  I was supposed to lead the charge for my detachment, while banging a cowbell.  I lost my gun, so I again demurred, but then decided I was being a coward, and jumped to the front, and directly confronted the “enemy” commander, who threw down a knife, initiating conflict again.

We fought for a while, and my side lost.  I retreated, and had to rerun my retreat–I have a rewind button in my dreams, sometimes–a couple times, but I got away.

Several thoughts occurred on waking.  One, that this reminds me a lot of the frequent internecine warfare between the Romans.  In one battle in modern Hungary, some 56,000 legionaries died on the same day.  You would have identically clad and armored and trained men who spoke the same language–albeit sometimes as a second or third language–killing one another in support of their man’s side in a dynastic dispute.

It is natural to run and hide from conflict.  It was only training, and particularly tying a conditioned response to the word “coward”, which allowed such senseless slaughters, among men who should have been brothers. For their part, the “barbarians” also prized courage, and they had often the added motivation of fighting for their lands, although of course the frequent cause of conflict is that they, too, had stolen other peoples stuff and raped and enslaved them, and the Romans were just protecting a part of their Empire.

And I thought of the religious conflicts between the Homoousians and the Arians, the vapidity of the difference between their creeds, and the knives that were stabbed in the necks and hearts and livers of at least thousands of men, woman, and likely even children over this ridiculously, obscenely small difference.  It would be no different than separating out a Boy Scout pack and waging war over the exact way to tie a particular knot, or the exact requirements to be an Eagle Scout. Surely it is a bad joke.  But it happened.

Then of course in terms of deep psychodynamics I am realizing that both the actively conscious part of me, and my defended side are on the same side.  There is no need to push it, contend with it, or do anything but welcome it.  It FEELS like a problem, because it has caused me a lot of grief and pain.  But on the other side, no it hasn’t: it has done its best, in its childlike but very watchful way, to protect me from existential assaults.  It is to be befriended.

In some important respects, it is likely best never to be overly angry with ourselves, even when we “screw up” badly.  That screw up happened because we never learned to relax and to interact with the world in an orderly way.  You can suppress screw ups through discipline, but that way you never learn what they had to teach you.  You kill off an important part of yourself.

Most of us fail to learn all the lessons we could have learned.  We all fail.  It is inevitable, and even if it isn’t, it should be treated that way.  Because if you insist on learning ALL the lessons you can, you will learn less than if you took a patient, welcoming, kind approach, and let those timid sensations and feelings gradually crawl and flitter out into the light.  When things organically expand, it has NOTHING to do with will, except in its absence.

It occurred to me last night that the word “ego” has very much the same ontological content as “balance”.  Nobody who watches gag reels, or high level gymnastics can doubt that the word balance refers to something, that there is a referent.

At the same time, balance is a dynamic concept.  There are types of balances, and the EXACT way you need to balance will always vary moment to moment, and people that are clumsy will fail to do it.

We all need an ego.  We need healthy self respect.  We need to have some sense of who we are, what we are capable of.  We need to have a history and at least a plan for the future.  We need to be located in time and space in some respect, even if not ROOTED in time and space.

I see so much silliness going on in the name of egolessness.  Most often, it seems to be used to avoid personal responsibility, to avoid hard decisions, as a support for the basic idea that we are all just happy brothers and sisters on this pastoral and peaceful Earth, and that only people who feel the need to defend themselves from the predations of others cause actual violence.  For example: such people gladly suffer the comforting lie that Communism was something other than a creed advanced by violence and subterfuge which appealed to and attracted the most mentally ill and power mongering wherever it went, and that it had and has as a goal the complete enslavement of the human race in a permanent regime of terror, despair, loneliness, cultural destruction, and impoverishment.

Look at history.  You don’t need to go more than 50 years back.  1965 Cuban terrorists were shooting in the head or locking in little cages for months people who refused to cooperate.  Vietnamese Communists were strapping explosives to the backs of 10 year old girls and sending them as suicide bombs on bicycles to kill other children on the playground.  They were mortaring nightly civilian areas, and assassinating every person in a position of any influence.  In 1968 the Soviets invaded Czechoslavakia.  In the mid-1970’s millions of Cambodian children, many under the age of 18, were strapping people who had been caught with a book or wearing glasses to tables, and torturing them to death with electrodes, and doing this multiple times a day.  Perhaps a third of the overall population was killed, all for nothing.  That was 40 years ago.

To THIS VERY DAY you can be locked in one of those soft torture cells in Cuba for dissidence, or killed.  TO THIS VERY DAY Islamists are decapitating Christians simply for being Christians, raping and enslaving their women and children, and continuing a path of conquest perfectly congruent with the original military conquests of the “great” Muhammad, who, too, loved treasure, sex slaves, the murder of innocents, and the destruction of entire civilizations.

What seems to be my task, and it is a difficult and unpleasant, but necessary task, is to square being open hearted and relaxed, with a very deep awareness of the human capacity for evil.  I need to both be clear eyed and forgetful.  Every moment I am not molested or hurt, or anyone I care about, I should relish and be grateful and enjoy myself.  But I need to recall without fear what sort of world this is.

Read this, and ponder: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Aisha

As I have said, there is great evil in the Christian doctrine of absolute and permanent damnation.  Islam takes all the worst elements of Christianity and makes them worse and unchanging.

Trauma is on all sides.  Your parents beat submission into you, because to do otherwise is to risk eternal damnation.  As an adult, you are expected to exercise no freedom of individual conscience.  There is no “exploring” in the creed whose very name comes from submission.  You can expect violence if you do not do as others around you do.

And within such an environment, no moral growth is possible.  You have to be free to explore, to be curious, to understand for yourself how and why moral codes come about.  All of this is sternly rejected and punished (in theory: as I have said before, the only good Muslims are bad Muslims).

And in the relationship between the sexes, it is force, trauma, rape and violence.  At age 50 or so Muhammad “married” Aisha.  At age 53 or so he fucked her.  This was almost certainly before puberty.  He was fucking a child who in this country would have been in third grade, would have been reading “Ramona the Pest” and watching the Cartoon Network or Disney. Edit: I read farther down in that link that he, the Great Prophet, loved to watch his 9 year old bride, with whom he was sexually active, play with dolls.

Ponder that.  Not all religions are created equal.  There is no basis in historical fact or philosophy to assume this is the case, other than a sophistry very congenial to those who believe nothing is worth fighting for.

And this is at the CORE of their doctrine.  I read within the past year about a Yemeni man marrying a 9 year old and causing so much internal bleeding from fucking her that she died from blood loss.  No doubt, his heartstrings being so sensitive, and his love so deep, he was profoundly wounded by his loss, and his next marriage was to an eleven year old.

The root problem with pedophilia is that it inherently represents a failure of emotional development.  The children you are attracted to are at roughly the age where you yourself lost your battle with trauma.  In Muhammad’s case, that was apparently before age 10.  Perhaps it was precisely that trauma–my guess would be getting sodomized by an older man, as indeed still happens in Afghanistan as an open part of their culture to this very day–which led him to the mountains.  Whatever he brought back, it was anything but the creed of a loving, caring, welcoming, just God.

Islam asks of the modern world a very basic question: what do you believe?  What is worth fighting for?  Are ANY of your developments in the realm of political freedom, freedom of conscience, equal justice before the law worth anything?  Are any of your cultural creations worth a pile of spit?  How would anyone know, when you persist in shitting on them?  Are your women worth defending?  Your children?  How openly can we spit in your faces and expect you to forgive us, not knowing that we meant it fully?  How easily can a vastly more powerful economic and military world be undermined from within, and at that virtually openly?

How fucking stupid and decadent are you?

It’s an open question.  We all need challenges in life.  Islam is a challenge to the world.  In its pristine form, it is absolutely incompatible with peace and anything like human decency, especially where women and children are concerned, but even where adult dissenters are concerned.  Fear can be the only prevailing emotion among those who believe that their only choices are submission and eternal hell.

The only comforts are those of sacrifice and sadism, particularly in the de facto human sacrifice of unbelievers, who like animals of old are decapitated in public as spectacle and for religious edification.  Or perhaps they are hung from trees like the Nordic captives of old, without the solace of having their suffering cut short through strangulation.  They are denied even that infinitesimal kindness.